Thursday, April 12, 2007

Place in this World

The wind is moving
But I am standing still
A life of pages
Waiting to be filled
A heart that's hopeful
A head that's full of dreams
But this becoming
Is harder than it seems
Feels like I'm

Chorus:
Looking for a reason
Roaming through the night to find
My place in this world
My place in this world
Not a lot to lean on
I need Your light to help me find
My place in this world
My place in this world

If there are millions
Down on their knees
Among the many
Can you still hear me
Hear me asking
Where do I belong
Is there a vision
That I can call my own
Show me I'm

Chorus. ~Michael W. Smith

This song is exactly how I feel. My apologies if my posts have been redundant. However, they are my posts... Last night I was at an event, and while I was sitting there this song popped into my mind, and it fit. This is exactly how I have been feeling. Moving here, I have been able to start me life over, in a way, but I am still trying to find what fits. Am I ready to be in a home group? Not sure. I enjoy the people, but the actual group discussions and don't believe I am ready for. I am on the fence, being torn between the side I would like to be on and my insecurities. Do I let the insecurities win or do I fight? If I choose to fight, how long will I be able to put up this fight?

Last night I thought about my place and thought about the place I want to be. That brought me no where! Wait, nope, that left me on my patio swinging on my new swing. I enjoy my life currently. The steps I have been taking are good ones. That may not be the perfect steps, but we all need to start somewhere. If I push too hard, I will end up a mess, so I am taking it slow. Taking it slow with a smile on my face. Until I figure out what is right for me, I will still be wondering what my place in this world is. I am okay with that!

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